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‚ô• Monday, March 30, 2009
dear all. my phone was admitted to the hospital. might not be able to contact me as... my old phone was also a goner. sms me if there's anything and i'll try to get back asap.
Blogged @ 5:20:00 PM
‚ô• Sunday, March 29, 2009
had been quite unlucky recently. fcuk. fri i was bit by regina which left me a huge bum on my left shoulder near neck. sigh then another which bleed was on my body. when i bite tootie after she bite me, she jus bite on my body!! T.T sobs. it jus bleed. ): look like some vampie bite. horrible.
The bite mark
the part of my body that it bleed.T.T
followed by yesterday, i was burn by exhaust pipe. on my left leg when i was about to get up. to went bowl. then after bowl, went timah to eat, i was burn on my right again after i get down!! ): both leg burn! ugly path of it now!! ): look like minnie mouse dress!! shits. and since thurs my phone had some problem, i couldn't hear anything on my phone ):!! sighs. winst0n, thank you for yesterday (::
friends thank you for the love (:: i really appreciated it. but. I strongly believe why he did this there's a reason. and somewhat there's a small portion of it which is about us the problems and another huge portion because he's afraid. Afraid that, the past might occur. I still clearly remember how he told me once about this girl whom was his ex. that left him, and the stuff which she did. which i felt, he thinks it might happen to him, again. i sympathy him. but yet what i felt for him wasn't just sympathy anymore. I can never say he was never good. yet I could never says he was bad. what i could say is. I over cared too much that y i couldn't let go. as for him the rs might just be a long flinging thing that y he continue his path to flirt and noe more gals which he might have think it's an way for him to pass time or life.
why i would say this because when ever i say a thing correct, he will never reply me and avoid. AARON KOHNGIAPCHIA! i know u too well too deep enough. i might not do thing right at the correct time correct moment but i never let go of stuff i like that easy. wad i always do was an implusive decision. i might not really trust you but who will? those girls who is not really into u will not care you noe new gals and flirt. just like how i used to be. do u even rem? i dont think so. Haven;t you realise that people tends to find you when they are in need? I apologised regarding ruining the rs of u and belle din i? but who else have i ruin? Eunice? NO I DONT THINK SO. SHE SHOULD BE SENSIBLE ENOUGH. which u told me you did told her i might be unhappy or sth but she still msg you those pranks msg, am i right? so was that counted my fault that i replied her? no. i dont think so.
Did it even occur to you that i know about of things about you that i would never want you to know because humans are realistic? too realistic to be known? I never want you to get hurt. by doing so am i bad? yes, i'm bad to you.
How well do you know me? i know almost every little stuff about you. to freak you out. I even know wad the freaking size is ur fingers. do you know mine? no i guess not. it might be nth to others. but does it occur how i noe that? HAHA! cusim clever we never had rings too. so how did i know? HAHAHHAA!! that why i said. i know you too well. but I wouldn't dared to say entirely.
Did it occur to you that.. I even asked dawson for an advise. wanted to ask sharon, but. i dare not cus i never see her/him online. I even ask andy. do you even know what advise they given me?! No you don't and never will know.
that night you said about my pw. but when i send u the request? did you accept it? no. you never accepted it. i never given access to anyone till now. maybe previously i gave it to zz which was the time you too, have my pw. but now. i ain't giving pw but an access to you. do you want me to remove the access? tell me do you?
What i could do not is nothing. suddenly i felt... what im typing now is like the discussion during my CCS class. WTF!
p/s: Rebecca. i suddenly feel when ever i got problems with Gemini guys. you are like my guardian angel. -,-" i dont know what should i say or do. T.T i jus love u too much.
silly, he had found someone new already why ain't you moving on.
val val val. bitch.
yea. im silly. since you found someone and got over our rs that quickly i should too shouldn't i? nvm. i shall find work to drown me with and move on.
my plans. get into that company for may to july. then work in pub through out. should be able to get over finally. feelings unspoken. unread. u said about it. yet my request u nvr accepted. till this day. then why had u said it in the first place. get me more hurt? ur mind now. only val val val. in love so fast eh? good.
Silly me. I still hoped but all had crashed. from the middle i guess she existed. u nvr contacted me but i guess her.. ): i'll never forget that name. i believe in Karma. her. good luck. u never cared. to be even say.
emo had been calling me non stop since last night. ): fall aslp only after emo called during half of the journey back home which was after having supper with kel. tummy feeling super unwell as i fall aslp.
woke up late for school. which i was supposed to reach at 9 sharp i reach almost 10 due to stomach problem. when to toilet like million times. i think my stomach is seriously spoil. ): hate injection so... im ignoring it wadever thing that is happening to it. sigh.
i wanted an injection of love not an injection for my damn tummy. ): sigh.
met merilynn at control station while on the way back home from sch, she was going to work. (: she's still uber cute. (:
i tried my very best to have a talk. trying very hard to savage everything. but my words could never be registered in u. the hurts. the pain was wad i did to u once before but had you though about it. how much stuff had i given in, how much stuff had i need to give in more in order to savage every thing? it's was as though telling me to accept every little 3rd party. if there would be one. have u even think of wad u wan in future? what could u really give me in future? have you though of y i had stayed by instead of getting off when i know you might never be able to take care of me in future? im not looking down on u. and u are looking too high up on urslf. you even said im looking too high on myslf. but i think yes i might be at times but my future is still unknown im not in the steps on career yet. not now. so why should i look down on myslf. i know im not as pretty as those models or wad ever girls. but i know sth. looks ain't everything.
if you got the look but u dont have inner. wad's good with look?
If you really love me. u would have been back to wad u used to be. and not trying to find excuses like what u're doing now to know more gals, and flirt with them. I din't restrict u on stuff in fb or wad already but yet.. ): but i never stop hoping u'd be back and start afresh.
I had took in too much excuse to begain. and i took in too much excuse to end. you made me think staying by and not leaving was a wrong choice i made last yr. going wit u to bkk spending very thing i have. and stay by u even when times are real bad that period. i could have leave just like what most other would do. but did u ever think why i never done it? because i hope too much. simple stuff make me contented. though i dare not say i'm not materialistic, but i dare say, i never had ask you get me stuff u could never affort.
problem arise always with girls and u ended us. was oso for them. how long they could be there for u? u told me jus now. u never think far because you could never knew how much longer u'd live. but have you ever even though that.. it's was also an excuse. ): an excuse for yourself and to end stuff between us. have you thought before that those stuff and excuse u do or said was just an excuse not to be hurt by me all over again?
everything was jus like a nightmare to me. finally it's ur turn to end it. and ending it in a way. i never had want it to be.
the two scars on my left hand was sth u nvr had knew. and now. i'll still not let u know. weather wad i am doing or wad. you will never bother too. cus. u shouldn't care. as for how will i be, i ain't sure too.
I thank you for everything. and hate u for everything. i love you for everything, but i wasn't urs.
you said if it's mine it eventurlly will be. if it's not it wun be. which was the same thing i told u 2yrs back. which you could never take it. how will i take it now?
facade.
im like typing all this to myself. cus the one will never had read.
It's been quite long. Too long to be count. but. there we are. catching up last night. This girl here is completely crazy. sms me like going 10 i think. to go drink with yuki. since i was kinda moody as well i agreed which was a right and a wrong move for me. ):
As usual cab down to fetch Sophia. o.o and we headed down to somwhere in town i forget the place already. then... while waiting for that "BABOON" to reach we was terribly hungry. grabbed sandwiches in 7eleven. i dont know why. but it's jus so coincidence we seems like some fan of 7eleven grabbing food there always. (._.")
after yuki reach we cabbed down to BABY FACE! i dislike that place. i dislike that guy who took the cabb with us too. he sucks! eeeekks! we met two aunties and they claimed to yuki that they were lesbian. whom are kinda interested in us. sheesh. they are so disgusting that they said to yuki they want his japanese COCK! WTF! LMAO. i don't know i should laugh or stun when i heard that. MUAHAHAHAA!!
after pastering yuki for a long time, we finally cabbed to NANA! while in the cab, we was having this topic about his poor tora which was burried in his garden. and sophia said saturday, we will be celebrating tora death. which i add on. which was the day she was born. HAHAHHAA!!
anyway saw some singer which was super cute. (:: and drink a lil then we headed back. it has been sooo long....
Blogged @ 6:24:00 PM
‚ô• Sunday, March 15, 2009
saw it again. a stab again. switched on my pc... and i wanna try to fix it. cus lappy wasn't around. there i was online-ing and trying to fix at the same time. then... guess wad... i flipped through my history chat log in msn.. read almost every thing. have yet finish. i already felt there's the need to......
then i realised....
shain't talk about it here. it'd be in my private entry ba. (:
meeting sophia soon. As SOON as she bath and get ready. and i think it'd be midnight by then. im already done. (::
was it a good news or a bad news. omfg. i couldn't believe my eyes when i saw wad gugu typed in msn. g0sh.
"another one"
may she get what she wish ba. (:: no matter wad happen, you will still always be my precious gugu. loves~
MOMO is giving me trouble lately. ): fcuk him. anyone wants him? ):
Blogged @ 11:07:00 PM
‚ô•
I quoted this since like when im in ITE.
鱼说：你看不见我的眼泪，因为我在水中。
水说；我能感觉到你的眼泪，因为你在我心中。
Those who know me well enough will know. and i found the original piece that was a story or sth. (: find it quite meaningful and just feel like posting it out.
13 th, Friday. I made it finally to the middle where im stuck there. trapped. I would put it in this way. rather then saying... i dont want to take anymore steps towards anywhere. if only earth could stop moving and trying to change every little things a little by little each day. if only peace exist. if only there's everlasting. if only..... there's too much if only in my head now! ):
though it doesn't change my way of seeing of u. but. yea. it does make a little difference.
met cynthia and walk to take train together. was super late for class. and then. was even later when i reach home after school. as.. i think traffic jam!! ass. yawns.
went to grab some papers during mike class with mel. then bryan and boxue tagged along and. it was freaking close that i was about to be hit by at car at car park. ><>
slept quite early today.. but halfway through my beauty sleep at 10-12, i was having a terrible headache which i dont really know why. ): then i have fragments of memory or dream that i remember which i does not know it just a dream or reality.
which was regarding that dbl o "outing" he went with David(s). I rem this part where he suddenly say ... i know some gal there lo. bla bla bla. it goes sth like that.
i smsed jason as i wanted to get out grab panadol wanted to ask if there's any nearby shop open that sell it other then limbang which is to far. ended Vincent msn me and ask me if im ok. and he bought panadols for me. I'm feeling much better or rather phically better. HAHA. which means... might be emotionally unstable yet. ROFL!!
